[15 Oct 2005|12:18pm] Hi Lauren! 1 comment|post comment

[30 Nov 2004|11:42pm] edited due to lewd comtent. 2 comments|post comment

[12 Jul 2004|03:11am] So it's about 3 am and i have to wake up in 4 and a 1/2 hours and what am i doing?? Why updating my live journal of course! Silly nonsense, you didn't think that I would actually be sleeping? Ahh well I have temporarily returned to my insomniac shit and will throughly regret it tomorrow, i mean today. Okay, enough bs. Camp. Camp is good; liking the little people, adorable little 3/4 year olds that need my help changing and such, refuse to tie there shoes, and, of course, wipe their buggers on my arm. Ahh yes, it is lovely. The life of a camp counselor. Otherwise stuff with school would be going along well if they would send my shit to me so that i could do trivial things like REGISTER FOR CLASSES. Classes that i'm sure are already taken. Marissa is wonderful as always :) Enjoying spending lots of time, esp. alone time with the drives and talks and such. Thank you for always knowing exactly what I need and never being afraid of telling me that i'm being silly or acting like an asshole. LOVE. Always. Friends are good too. I like going out and having a social life and this driving thing is making it a lot easier to see everyone. I am lucky to have people in my life who don't mind spending time w/ me. Thanks. 6 comments|post comment

The harder I push the farther I fall.. [29 Jun 2004|12:34am] [ mood | inadequate & pathetic ] [ music | Dashboard ] I want to give you whatever you need. What is it you need? Is it what I need? I want to give you whatever you need. What is it you need? Is it within me? 1 comment|post comment

:) [27 Jun 2004|03:28pm] Summer seems to be going well on the social front. Relationship and friendships are good. Hanging out with friends is fun. Oh, I drive now too, yes I passed that test thing. Unfortunately, my sense of direction is lacking. Sigh. I AM trying to improve myself by looking at maps and such. Hopefully I will improve. The job front is kind of crappy though. I could deal with the jappy people but it seems like everything that could go wrong with this job has. Crappy bus stop thing and now I don't even have an assigned group which means shitty tips. I wish they would have said something to me earlier because I don't like the nature of this arrangement. 3 days before camp and wtf am I supposed to do? It seems like this was haphazardly done and no one knows what they are doing at this camp. We shall see what happens. LoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLove 6/18/03 2 comments|post comment

[17 Jun 2004|12:41am] Yeah, so it's been a while since my last update but now I have good things to write about...YAY! So, I got into George Washington which is nice but I also got into Tulane w/ a scholarship. As long as I can find housing it looks as though I'll be leaving in New Orleans next year. Don't expect me to pick up the southern thing especially the ya'll. Eww. I'm also doing the day camp thing and I have my lovely anniversary toy this friday! So definite yay-overload. I'm happy on many levels although I'm not sure if that is such a good thing. Life is looking up but it's only a matter of time before karma kicks me in the ass. Love to all and thank you hunny for putting up w/ all of my nonsense. :) 3 comments|post comment

[05 Jun 2004|01:33pm] So this week was pretty cool although I must say I am seriously worried about my job situation, or lack there of. Oh and I'm also seriously worried about my college situation, or lack there of. I feel like I have no control over anything. Give me about two weeks and everything will be fine. I hope. On a lighter note, I want to go into the city. What I don't understand is why I can't find people to go with me?? It's fun. Also, I want to go to bars/clubs, emphisis on the clubs though because I want to dance. To do all of these fun things I need money. Sigh. People are fun, all of them. I am going to miss New York when I go to school. That is all. LOVE. 3 comments|post comment

[31 May 2004|03:47pm] Eww..I was almost finished updating this thing when my stupid laptop kicked me offline. Any who, sent out my grades and now I just have to wait. Hopefully everything works out for the best. Looks like I may finally have found a job. I have my second interview at blockbuster tomorrow and although it may not be the most glamourous or prestigous job at least it's a paycheck with free movie rentals. The schedule changes weekely but they said you can swap with people. Sigh, I hope everything works out. Hanging out is fun. People are fun. Alone time is fun. Reading is fun. Being in love is more than fun. Summer is looking up and thanks for showing up on saturday guys. Sorry Lauren couldn't stay longer and that Tini and Shiffman couldn't come. I like all of the people I choose to hang out with. Enough said. Till nextime.. 3 comments|post comment

Time for an update.. [22 May 2004|12:41pm] So I'm home now, and for an extended period of time! Surprisingly, I did well this semester. A few grades, good and bad, that I wasn't expecting but they cancel each other out. I think I've done more in the past week at home than I did through out the entire spring semester. Hung out w/ mom, charles, and lauren. Saw movies, went job hunting, and a lot of much needed alone time w/ someone special:) Extra early morning visits, breakfast in bed and afternoon showers. Sigh. P.S.- I told you Parkside was great..Love. So, I should be happy, and I am, sometimes. I feel like I am the kind of person that could be unhappy anywhere, with anyone. I want to change that so I'm going to write down, daily, what makes me happy. New tiny, seemingly insignificant, things/patterns/behavioral neuroses that make me happy. Wish me luck! Look forward to a great summer with everyone!! 3 comments|post comment

[08 May 2004|11:19pm] [ mood | pensive ] Wow..long time no update. I'm sorry but there was my shit to be done, not to mention having the sasser virus. Anyway, where to begin? I just wrapped up my last week of classes and now onto the finals. The amount of stress that I have been putting on myself is ridiculous; I mean it, truly absurd. I just can't wait to get out of Stony Brook, no offense to anyone who attends or will be attending; however, it just isn't the right place for me. I know I'm just awful to be around or talk to and yes, I do realize that the stress thing isn't an adequate excuse but it's the only thing I have to offer. That, along with an apology, so this is me saying I’m sorry. Hopefully I will be good as new in a week and a half, hopefully? Good luck to everyone on finals and I will see you all shortly!!! YAYAYAY!!! 2 comments|post comment

[18 Apr 2004|01:42am] I'd like to apologize for not updating sooner. To recap, Spring Break was amazing, as to be expected and now things are..surprise, surprise..boring. I don't understand myself anymore. Today, for example, I should have been really happy, should being the operative. I'm not though, I'm really not. I got exactly what I wanted, right? What else is there? Did I expect too much from people? Do I expect too much from people? Do I hype things up to be more important than they really are? If this isn't making me happy what will? Am I over-dramatic? Am I a baby? What am I doing wrong and who actually gives a shit? I don't even know what to say? What's left to say? 5 comments|post comment

Just another day [24 Mar 2004|04:08pm] [ mood | ehh ] [ music | my guitar...yay, i'm learning to play! ] Today feels like quite the ordinary day; the class thing, the work thing, and the study thing. I'm totally procrastinating the whole midterm thing for Humanities but I don't seem to care...thinking...nope, don't care. After I finish this journal thing seriously have to start working on stuff, next week I have a test, a quiz, and two paper-like things. At least I am going home this weekend! I have my apartment to myself this weekend, you know what that means. Well, actually it means that I'm going to sit on my ass, watch T.V., and get almost no work done. Oh, and I'll be driving too, more like crash-course in parallel parking..LOOK I MADE A PUNNY! Can't wait for my week off and important people time!!! YAYAY. Also today is my mom's birthday, so happy 50th mom. Although she'll never see this. Ciao. 3 comments|post comment

While my guitar gently weeps.. [20 Mar 2004|07:41pm] Okay, yes..it HAS been quite a busy week. I HATE arguing, truly hate...with a passion. Sometimes you just have to let go and recognize that there are some situations that you don't have any contol over. I am, by no means, a control freak but I do like getting what I want. I'm almost proud of myself for managing to do the whole 19 credits thing with a job. Granted, as some people would say, they are courses that I am inclined to excel in but I should be proud of myself nonetheless, right? So I got my first paycheck which didn't even cover my mom's birthday gift but whatever. She's going away this week for her 50th with Lloyd. Any who, there really isn't that much to complain about excluding the weather. It sucks. It's cold and wet, and worst of all it's spring and all I can see is snow. What kind of a spring is that? Spring in New York, of course. Last but not least certainly I would not forget to include HAPPY TOY, in my journal. So.. HAPPY TOY LOVE. 5 comments|post comment

Back at the Brook, Stony Brook that is.... [14 Mar 2004|04:55pm] So I'm back at Stony Brook. Going home was fun as always and it was a nice change of pace and I miss the privacy of home. I also miss the lovely banter with my mother. As much as I complain about her I really do love her and sometimes I forget how great she really is. I was looking through a whole bunch of nostalgic stuff; stuff not to be confused with crap because this stuff is part of my childhood. While I was looking through this stuff I found these puzzles that my mom had sent to every destination city on my trip through Italy. Basically 4 or 5 puzzles with messages written on the back so that I wouldn't get home sick. Isn't it amazing how quick we are to forget about the little things? So yeah, I love my mommy. On the other side of the parenting equation I also saw my father this weekend. There is always this awkward feeling/vibe that I can't help but give off. I know he sees it but I am a truly unforgiving person and if I could change that I would but how does one go about such a change? On a lighter note we saw the Jesus movie, yes I know that The Passion of the Christ IS it's title but I don't think that I can reconcile the images of that movie to the days leading up to the death, and the death of Christ. It was powerful but not for religious reasons in my opinion. It was also gruesome and anti-Semitic in my opinion. Enough of this, work in less than and hour. :( Ciao! P.S.- Italian midterm tomorrow...Wish me luck! 2 comments|post comment

[09 Mar 2004|08:46pm] You are the chinese element of Water. People who are under the element of Water are creative, independent and intelligent. Water you are a dreamer, but are quite vulnerable, and have hidden agendas. The color of water is black, and your symbol is the tortoise. Winter is the season in which Water shines and it's months are October/November. Your weather condition is cold. Water is the direction of north, and your day is Wednesday, while your planet is Mercury. Animals under your element are usually shelled. People under you are Turks. Your sense is hearing, your taste is salty, your sound is moaning and your virtue is knowledge. Your organs are the kidneys. You were created by Metal and control Fire. Which of the 5 Chinese Elements Are You? brought to you by Quizilla 2 comments|post comment

Don't forget I'll hold your head/ Watch the night sky fading red [09 Mar 2004|08:08pm] So..been rather busy doing absolutely nothing lately. Okay STOP...I said STOP...I MUST stop writing this way if not for your sake at least for mine. Don't you realize that all of my entries are incredibly boring and not the least bit R a NdO m. Not that I'm a muse of random or even all that random myself but I would like to think of myself as slightly more interesting. My life is rather predictable but that excuse simply does not carry any weight this time. I mean and I do have drama in my life; things are by no means perfect. There are, however, certain people that seem to make everything worth while. I have a lot to be thankful for: friends, family, YOU, my health, and I think I may even be doing well in school. Oddness. Things could be worse but I try not to focus on the negative aspects on my life and henceforth this journal WILL be more interesting. I make no promises but if you see me following any of my old trends...shake me, will you? Thanks. LOVELOLOVELOVELOVELOVELOVEVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE. 1 comment|post comment

Time for an update [03 Mar 2004|04:09pm] So I'm back to reality, although I do love every break i get from it. The weather is getter nicer here which means spring is coming, YAY. Which means that school will be ending in 2 1/2 months, more YAY. For now though I must study, most of the applications are in now I must wait. Sigh.. Have some serious studying to do and many days to go to work this week. :( Too many days to even count...Tear. 4 comments|post comment

Back to reality..well, almost [26 Feb 2004|11:17pm] Okay so the most fascinating of my journal entries yet which really isn't hard but whatever. So I visited Marissa in New Orleans and it was the most fun I've had in a long time. I had no idea that catching beads and other random items, i.e. cups, radios, etc. could be so much fun. Perhaps it was Mardi Gras but more likely it was Marissa, I always have a great time whenever I'm around her. So I went to New Orleans and caught beads and ate too much fast food and drank but not nearly enough and smiled. Then Marissa came back to Stony Brook and we studied and went to EOB with Tini and Alfred then watched E.T. and ate junk food. Those Doritos are NOT breakfast food, lol. Today I had a World Politics test which I did well on and went to Sports Plus where I proceeded to bowl and play air-hockey, no need to get into air-hockey stories though, right? Now I'm doing essays and transfer application stuff. Sigh, I may never sleep tonight. LOVE LOVE LOVE. 3 comments|post comment

[17 Feb 2004|02:21pm] Hello all. Starting off this week with the knowledge that I will be in New Orleans by the end of it. So, I'm happy at least. Those trips home are looking like they may be weekly occurrence. Things are surprisingly good at home, I think. Stony Brook is Stony Brook. It's cold and boring but it only for the next few months I hope. Off to write an email to my Italian pen-pal, it's for class. Ciao! 2 comments|post comment

Tap on my window, knock on my door...I, want to make you feel beautiful [12 Feb 2004|02:30pm] [ music | She will be loved ] Sigh..Almost done with another week, YAY! I still have an American History test in 3 hours but ehh, I'm on a little break from studying. Work training tonight:( At least I'm getting paid. I've been listening to that maroon 5 song she will be loved and i really like it so all of you who don't like that can kiss my arse. Anywho..must study. 9 5 comments|post comment

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